Ryan and Christy's Place

I don't usually start out my conversations with strangers this way:

"Hi, I'm Christy. My husband's in Iraq. Man, he's been gone more than a year! That's crazy."

But now, I realize that my life is wrapped up in that very statement. It's the core of me, most everything that I think about and care about, and basically, my identity in a lot of ways. I attended a training class for work recently where I met a lot of new people, and the question of my marital status did come up.

"So, are you married?"

"Yes I am. I got married in April actually."

"Oh a newlywed! How's married life?"

This is usually when I stall. "Um, well." Then I just spit it out. "Well, my husband's in Iraq, so I really haven't lived with him."

Usually the reaction is what I expect -- "oh my gosh! how tough! wow! that has to be awful!", etc. -- and usually I try to make sure my face doesn't have an "Oh, poor me, I might burst into tears at any moment" expression on it. Because though I do randomly burst into tears, I'm usually not at the point of crying when I tell someone that Ryan's in Iraq -- but they look at me like I might.

Then, after I utter the words -- "he's in Iraq" -- it's like my mouth turns into a faucet. I talk about him, and talk, and talk, and tell tons of things, like how it's been and how long he's been gone and what it's like for me and man, that desert is hot and boy, I cant' wait until he gets home and hahaha he has camel spider and scorpion wars in plastic bottles! And luckily, they're usually a captive audience. I mean come on, it's pretty interesting.

So over the past few days I've pretty much talked about Ryan nonstop to people I don't really know. And it's nice. I realize that I talk about him to my friends, but maybe not in a happy way. Maybe I only talk to them about him if I'm sad or upset and not when I'm happy, not when I'm doing fine and just TALKING about life. And how proud I am of him.

That's the most important thing. I am so proud of my husband. I loved talking about him so much these past few days. He makes me shine. There are no words to express how much. But Ryan, you're the strongest man I know. I love you!

-- Christy