Ryan and Christy's Place

They're usually around 10 a.m., the dates.

I know it's an odd time, but it's the best time. The morning sunlight filters just right through the windows, giving good light to my Web cam. If I'm lucky, I have enough time to drag a brush through my hair and put my contact lenses in. Sometimes he laughs at me because my hair looks so bad.

These dates don't involve primping or makeup. I don't even brush my teeth, usually, because I'm in such a hurry. They're not too regular, either. He hardly calls, but then again, that can't be helped. And to be honest, I jump at his every beck and call. The phone rings -- I drop everything to answer. He gets online? All my plans go to the wayside.

I'd consider all this pretty healthy.

We could talk about almost anything on our dates. His job -- but most often, he can't tell me what he does. The weather -- pegged as a "boring" date topic, but it's pretty interesting, to be honest, with temperatures topping 100 degrees and the prettiest sunsets. Stories about crazy things his guy friends do -- they're funny and always make me laugh.

To be honest, he has more guy time than me time. It's a given, really. But I'll be honest; I'm jealous. Sure, I'm jealous. But what can you do, really? At least we have our dates.

Sometimes, they're romantic. He'll tell me how much he loves me, and how much I mean to him, and I'll say the same, and we'll say things that move us to tears; things so heartfelt I pinch myself to see if it's really me, here, with this wonderful person.

Sometimes, we bicker. We get stressed about things and grumble to each other, or cry. (OK, only I cry.)

But always, I love our dates. They have a level of intimacy I've never experienced. We've become so close from being so far away. Sometimes I wonder how long it would have taken us to get to this point in our relationship if we weren't going through something like this. It might be different. Not bad different, just different. We might be at a different place.

Nothing tells your heart what it desires more than seeing someone you love more than life itself driving into the distance in a Humvee, when you don't know when it will be bringing him home. We've had our reality, our heart-jerking moment of truth when we said, "Yes, I love you, and I want you forever," without a doubt, without blinking, without a moment of, "But what if." In moments like this, life is black and white. The gray is gone, and you see things with a clarity that didn't exist before. You see inside a person; you see him inside out, and you see inside yourself.

So, we have these dates.

Sometimes, we keep them light so the reality of our situation doesn't crash down on us. Sometimes, we talk about serious things. Sometimes, he stands me up, but he can't help it. There is no blame here, only sincere love and affection.

I'll be ready tomorrow at 10 a.m. If he's there, I will be, too. My heart is always with him.

-- Christy